REAL Confidence

This week we discussed how we can show real confidence in others, not just a casual pat on the back that may have no basis in fact. Have you ever received a compliment that you knew was not true or that felt like someone was just puffing you up? Of course you have. Somewhere along the way we decided that positive statements were required in conversation. In efforts to be pleasant we have resorted to lying to one another. You may think that sounds harsh but it is not too far from reality. We seek to cover up our lack of real closeness by constantly saying nice things to one another. If it isn't true is it really nice? If it is said just to fill dead space in the conversation because you have nothing of substance to say, is it really nice? Real compliments are needed. Real confidence is needed. We need to build up one another, equip one another. But those things must come from truth and the spirit. I am beginning to sound like a broken record. You have to know someone to know their gifts. It is evident from the letters to Timothy that Paul KNEW him. He knew his history and family and was able to lift him up and encourage his personal gifts. Our friends and co-laborers need encouragement. Your acknowledgement of their gift may set them on a path of greater service. You may be the spark that begins much. Life is not always easy and confidence can do a great deal to keep us moving forward.

What did Paul express confidence in? First he expressed confidence in Timothy's faith. Faith that came from his mother and grandmother.

Next he expresses confidence in his gifts. Gifts that can be fanned into flame by the Holy Spirit. He reminds Timothy, and us, that we do not walk this road alone.

Some of us may need a confidence booth in our faith - there are valleys and peaks in all things.

Some of us may need a confidence boost in our gifts/abilities. It may take someone else to point out an effective role for our talents.

What can we do?

• Examine your speech this week. Watch for pleasant sounding remarks that may not actually be true. Attempt to speak only truth.
• Offer an encouraging remark to someone who is having a slump in their faith walk. Boost their spiritual confidence. Remind them of when they supported you, prayed for you, lifted you up.
• Point out some one's gift. You may be the first person, or the 100th, but all confidence helps. Give an example of where you see the gift. BE specific. Be truthful. Don't just toss out the compliment and run away.

We will not have class for the next two weeks, so look for the next Tuesday Teaser in the next year!

Tuesday Teaser for 12/17

This week we will be discussing confidence in looking at the letter to Timothy. I love the two letters we have from Paul to Timothy. I love the personal look at their relationship. It reminds me a great deal about the lesson on mentoring. Paul is intentional in his words of support and encouragement to Timothy. He succeeds where many of us fail. Why is that? I want us to think about these statements tomorrow.

• Paul knows Timothy well, knows his gifts and his faults.
• Paul expresses confidence in what he knows to be true. Timothy can do great things by fanning the flame of the spirit within him, a flame that is uniquely fired under his personal gifts/abilities.
• Paul does not encourage Timothy to be anything more than the best he can be. He does not tell him positive-sounding lies.

How can we truly encourage our brothers/sisters? How can we show real confidence?

REAL Support

Forgive the lateness of this post. I remembered last Friday but then it escaped me again. Can anyone identify with that? :) I truly enjoyed our class on support last week. We discussed many things but came to some fairly simple conclusions. You can better provide real support when you know what is actually needed. To know what is needed you need to walk alongside someone, real support can not be lobbed from afar. This presents some difficulties however...How do we walk along side someone? What if we have nothing in common, do not mesh, or otherwise do not fit? I have no good answers for this. My suggestion is to put yourself out there, be willing to get hurt, and most importantly ask God to show you who He has in mind. I do not think we can immerse in every one's life but we can do more than we are, and even when we think we can do no more, God will fill our cup again.

Another important part of our class was the idea of bad things happening because someone deserves them. While we can certainly be capable of digging our own holes and wallowing in bad decisions that lead to even worse consequences, bad things do not always come from bad decisions. Some people seem to walk under a dark cloud they did not bring through their own actions. Jesus tells us that blindness need not come from sin, but can be a way for God to be glorified. (John 9:1-3) Support is needed in times of stress regardless of the circumstances. Additionally, when someone is in pain it is not the time to preach. Learning/teaching should occur but it frequently should be preceded with something more supportive.

How shall we begin being supportive?

• Look at your past experiences - are there times when others supported you effectively? What worked for you? What did not work for you? List some concrete ideas.
• Ask friends about their struggles - what worked for them? We all have different circumstances, their concrete suggestions will often be different from yours.
• Ask a ministry leader if they know someone who fits with your experiences and capabilities. Have you learned tough financial lessons? Could you help someone with budgeting from a place of supportive experience rather than a judgemental preaching stance? Have you lost someone close to you? Can you sit quietly with those who are grieving with filling the space with useless platitudes? There is someone who needs what you have to offer. Ask God to lead you to them.

Tuesday Teaser for 12/10

This week we will be discussing the support we seek from others and the success and failure of that experience. We will first look at the book of Job in the Old Testament,a man who lost more than most of us can imagine. How did his friends respond? What did they do well? (There are somethings they did well - :) ) Comforting others in times of need is challenging. What to say, what not to say, when to come, when to go, what is truly needed? A band-aid over a gun shot wound will not help and provides no support. Telling someone to "go in peace, be warmed and be filled, and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that?" (2 James 16) Some emotional wounds need more than a pat on the back.

Real support will take time, energy, resources, and did I mention time?

I am reminded of a commercial a few years back. Some medieval lords and a king are sitting around a table. A thundering noise, maybe the sound of monstrous dragon?, is approaching. One knight shouts out that he has a solution. Get out the catapult and load it with bags of gold bars, etc and hurl it at the approaching beast. "Throw money at the problem?!?!?!?!" Hilarious commercial. Often we want to get a quick fix for some really big stuff. We want to send a card, write a check, take a casserole, and BE DONE. I am not diminishing the need for cards, casseroles and checks. The work of the kingdom is done at times through these means. What I want us to talk about is what real support looks like. The visit that comes with the casserole, the prayers that bathe the cards you send,.....

Real support will take time, energy, resources, and did I mention time?

See you tomorrow!

REAL Equality

Thank you to all the girls who made it to class last night. I enjoyed this topic, even if it is difficult since it speaks to the desire in each of us to be better than those around us. When we are young we can perceive the world as revolving around us - talk to any three year old and they will prove it. :) However God calls us to move beyond being spiritual three year olds and begin to see others the way He sees them - as wonderfully made and beloved by Him.

What is all came down to is that equality is not a word we can throw around. Equality will not be seen through words but in action. Do you treat others as equal to yourself, whether they have the same background as you or not? Our challenges this week...

• Smile and give encouraging words to EVERYONE around you this week. Even the painfully slow drive through worker and the annoying friend who does not know they are annoying.
• Ask three people how they see God working int heir lives. This may bring a few surprises and might be a much needed question for them as well.
• Listen to someone you would typically blow off - there are many people we breeze by in a weeks time.

Short post today - we need actions not words to practice equality.

See you next week...

Tuesday Teaser for 12/3

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday with family and friends. It is my favorite holiday, since it the only time I see some members of my family. I pray that we are all returning with more energy and desire for community. This week we will be studying equality. Another difficult topic. We live in a world that likes to rank things. There are top ten everything. What are your top movies? Top tv shows? Top friends? We are not called to be best friends with everyone, not everyone can tolerate my quirkiness. However we are equal in the eyes of God. Some are not more equal than others. That is in opposition to the very definition of the word equal!

This week we will be looking at the book of Philemon. A fascinating personal look at a very unique set of circumstances. It is almost a made for tv plot. Slave runs away from master, accidentally encounters another man who knows previous owner, learns the good news of Christ and now finds himself returning to the life he ran from - voluntarily. We can sometimes think we live in tumultuous times in regards to race and socioeconomic status. I think even the 60s could not hold a candle to the concepts that first century followers of Christ were asked to deal with as it relates to equality.

Gods definition of worth goes beyond our job, our money, our skin or hair color, our country of origin, our education, our physical abilities, or even our knowledge of Him. We are all loved by the same creator, and he wants ALL to be saved. In Him all are equal - period.

See you tomorrow!